Fghjkl returned to his state room and switched on the video feed of the human quarters. The Guerrillians had acrimoniously dumped him onto the floor. The human began to stir after a few minutes and raised up onto his hands and knees. He shook his head as if clearing it and spent a moment or two coming to terms with the events of the last 10 minutes. His face contorted. Fghjkl always found it interesting that every species had a different way of expressing anger, but nearly all of them involved some form of facial manifestation. The human’s brow furrowed, he jumped to his feet and began to scream. Gone was his idle amiability. He sprinted towards the door and began banging his fists against the steel structure. Fghjkl would have laughed if it wasn’t so pathetic. Where was the humans’ seemingly unlimited cunning and power that Fghjkl had viewed? According to the footage, there were many instances where a door such as this would pose no barrier. The human would usually be wearing some sort of tight-fitting costume, but the intelligence team hadn’t recorded that any prosthetics or equipment were key to the human’s abilities.
The human continued to roar and manically pound against the frame. Eventually, he seemed to tire, and he put his back against the door and slid down onto the floor. Well, this was disappointing, Fghjkl thought. He picked up the receiver to his communication device with the Guerrillians, “Bring him back to the interrogation room, please, gentlemen.” He watched as the human was startled as the door clanked as it was yanked open by the Guerillan. Hilariously, the Guerrillians hadn’t actually locked the door, but the human, in his anger and frustration, hadn’t even tried the doorknob. He stood up with some conviction, seemingly now ready to demonstrate his defiance. Fghjkl stared intently, figuring this was the moment when they would see his true power. One of the Guerillians casually slapped him across the face and used his other arm to keep him upright. The blow stunned the human, and was enough for the other Guerillian to restrain him with two arms and to carry him with the other two arms.
Fghjkl left his state room again and wandered back to the impromptu interrogation room. By the time he opened the door and entered, the human was sat back at the table, sporting a Guerillian hand mark across his face.
“Are you ready to listen now?” asked Fghjkl, as he sat down?
The human looked up. Fghjkl took that as a good sign and continued, “We are representatives of the high galactic council. We are here to invade your planet. Is that clear?” The human nodded his head, which Fghjkl assumed was a sign of understanding. “Excellent. My intelligence chief tells me that you are a great leader on your planet.” The human’s face changed to bemusement. Fghjkl was sure there was nothing wrong with the translation devices, so he eyed the human carefully. “Speak,” he commanded and motioned to the Guerillian who was within the human’s eyesight to offer a threatening gesture. This did the trick, “leader?” He asked, sounding confused. Fghjkl furrowed his brow “Are you not a leader of your people?” The question appeared to be surprising to the human, and he snorted in amusement. That seemed to give him some confidence. “So you are really aliens?”
Fghjkl ignored him and addressed the Guerillian to his right, “Bring me the squid” his tone was dangerously formal and even a species with the size and strength of a Guerillian was put on edge. The behemoth hurried off, much less assured than when handling the prisoner.
“You’re going to eat?” Asked the human.
Fghjkl ignored him again and instead placed his elbows onto the desk and steepled his fingers together. This task force had taken this mission for granted from the start, and he’d noted that liberties were being taken that he would normally have cracked down on.
He didn’t have to wait long before the Guerrillian returned with his chief of intelligence in tow. He had crossed four of his tentacles in annoyance, and would no doubt have crossed more if he didn’t need them to walk. He took the sight of the beaten prisoner and Fghjkls’ manner and wisely decided to tone down his outward annoyance. “Captain, you asked for my presence?”
“Yes,” replied Fghjkl, he motioned to the human, “please tell my chief of intelligence what you just told me.”
The human’s eyes had nearly popped out of his head when the squid-shaped chief of intelligence had entered. Fghjkl eyed the human carefully until he spoke, “I’m…I’m… not any sort of leader”, he stammered.
“What?” said Chief Squid. “Do not lie, human, I have seen the footage. I have seen the other humans adore you, beg for your favour. The humans dispatch recording equipment to capture your feats of bravery and battle. I have seen this with my eyes. How can you deny it?”
“Footage?” the human was confused. “I am a movie star”, he said, not able to hide the musk of pride underneath his words.
“An actor?” Fghjkl barked, staring intently at the Squid. “Yes”, said the human. “I’ve appeared in many, many movies.”
“I have seen you battle dinosaurs”, the Squid said intently, an edge of worry creeping into his tone.
“Yes, that’s what it looks like”, said the human, “but that’s all CGI.”
“What?” said Fghjkl, still staring intently at the Squid, “is CGI?”
“Well, it’s generated imagery. It’s not really there. A special effect…I mean, that’s what I thought these two were,” he motioned at the Guerrillians.
“I see”, said Fghjkl. The squid was now stonily quiet. Fghjkl continued, addressing the human but still staring at his colleague, “You mean to tell me that the intelligence our advanced technical teams gathered was nothing more than staged theatre, designed, I assume, to entertain people? And that you and you’re popularity is nothing more than a whim by which the humans enjoy themselves?” The squid was now squirming. He had been particularly arrogant when he had been assigned to work under Fghjkl, often audibly complaining that this was beneath his station. Fghjkl hadn’t blamed him. He was a military commander in his own right, but this, well, this kind of mistake had consequences.
Fghjkl turned his attention now fully back onto the human “I believe we’ve mistreated you my friend. Allow me to begin making amends by dining with you.” he motioned to one of the Guerillians, “please make the arrangements. To the other “he nodded at the Squid,” not saying anything.
Several hours later, Fghjkl was sitting in the state room sharing a meal with the human. “ So tell me”, he said, “humans actively intoxicate themselves?”
The human nodded, not quite sure what to make of his situation. “How strange and barbaric”, Fghjkl commented.
Fghjkl smiled, thinking of the now vacant position of Chief of Intelligence. “I suppose we aren’t so different”, he agreed. “But tell me, who runs the world?”
“Oh, I don’t know”, said the human, “we’re not so different.” He forked a ring from the plate in front of him. “These calamari rings are a popular dish on planet Earth. They taste so fresh as well.”
To be continued ..
